Note: I wrote the following story for the Smarter Artist Pity Par-tay Flash Fiction Contest. It’s a silly story involving some of the people from the Smarter Artist Summit (April 26-27, 2017), and involving a mashup of an item chosen from each of two columns. Apologies in advance to everyone whose name appears… of course this is all a work of fiction, and you’re all awesome. Other than this Celeste person, who is entirely fictional. As is Elliott.
Goofy stuff
Portland by night
Automatticians and a Portland Brewcycle tour of three craft breweries, followed by a trip to Rogue Brewery and Voodoo Donuts. Really, does anything else need to be said?
Holidays with Merlin Automatticat
This holiday thing is great. My mom got to spend extra time playing with me and letting me snuggle on her lap and watch Netflix with her. I also got lots of things to play with. My favorite was the box. It was awesome! When mom opened it there was a whole bunch of useless things inside, but that was fixed soon enough. It was a fun box, full of red tissue paper. Don’t worry, I made sure to rip it up and kick pieces all around the living room. I also discovered this brick cave with a metal curtain and all this ash to dig around in, but I keep getting squirted with water when I go in there and mom yells at me to get out of the fireplace. It’s so unfair! She did make sure I got a bunch of turkey, and string cheese, and even some yogurt. The waffles were the best, though, and I made … Read more…
Flying Squirrel Feces
While I’m actually not surprised that it could have some sort of beneficial effect, I’m trying to work out how they discovered this was medicinal. Imagine the person 2000 years ago who stumbled upon flying squirrel feces laying around and thought to himself, hmm, let me taste this and see if it’s good for me.